Wednesday, January 20, 2016

The Older I Get...

When I was a kid, doctors always seemed "old." I asked my mom recently about a doctor I had when I was 18 who is still practicing medicine in my town. "Wasn't he old back then?" I asked her.

She looked confused. "No...I'd say he was in his 30s."



As I got older, I started noticing something. Doctors, dentists, and hair stylists all suddenly were younger than I was. I'd go to the dentist and see this:



I always wanted to ask, "Are you old enough to have been through dental school?" But that would be rude. So I just trusted that these kid-medical professionals knew what was going on.

Then it hit me...they aren't old. I am.



Recently, while looking for a hair stylist, I spent a while researching local places. I even tried one out with an eyebrow wax appointment. This is about the age of the women who work in those places now:



The girl took me back to the eyebrow-waxing area and proceeded to talk like 20-year-olds talk. Lots of "likes" and "totes" and "awesomes." It was like listening to one of these talk:



An hour or so every six weeks in the chair, listening to that? I don't think so. Call me crazy, but I just want someone I can have a normal human conversation with. Although listening to vocal fry and this post-Millennial version of Valley Girl speak is good for my career. I just don't feel like I can have that stylist-customer bond with one of those girls. Plus...this:



So my search continues. But is it too much to want a stylist with some post-30s brains? And as we get older, isn't it a normal fact of life that our medical and beauty providers will be the same age as our children? Then grandchildren? After all, this could eventually be worse than Valley Girl speak from your doctor...



How do you find good doctors, dentists, and hair stylists? Does age or gender matter?

63 comments:

  1. Yeah, that while getting older thing...
    My doctor is about my age, but the hygienists at my dentist's office could all be my daughters. A little weird.
    The worst is the gym. Teen girls come I dressed I next to nothing. Some of the guys ogle, but all I can think is put some clothes on, child!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That definitely happens as you get older! There are women my age who talk about male celebrities in their early 20s being "hot" and they just look like kids to me!

      Delete
  2. Your post made me laugh. Thank you. I guess I am sort of lucky with my doctors and hair stylists. Friends referred me years ago to my doctors office. I have relied heavily on connections. The problem is I am scared some of them will retire. Lol. My hairstylist was my Yoga mentor. I love sitting in her chair and listening to her perspective on life. Maybe keep searching. The right people will eventually show up. I believe that.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My dentist has been out sick for a while--he's at retirement age. His replacement looks about 20. He's nice, but I'm thinking, "Are you even old enough to drink, let alone have finished dental school?"

      Delete
  3. It can be worse. I am finding that I am that bossy old woman. I just tell them what I am expecting.
    I wanted the red carpet thrown out for me at the vet's office. They did at my previous vet. However, this vet offers emergency treatment after hours which I hope I never need. So I will keep trying to train them.
    To tone it down or dish it out is my question. lol, I'm dishing it out.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I went to a vet once who acted like he didn't like my dog. I didn't go back. They don't have to gloat on whatever dog I have at the time or even say he's/she's the cutest dog ever...but acting annoyed or disgusted isn't going to bring me back!

      Delete
  4. My doctor, dentist and dental hygienist are all about my age. My hairstylist is young and tattooed and yet we connect on so many things. I look forward to chatting with her!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm sure it's about finding the right one! Some people are just naturally good with people. Amazing how much that factors into it for me. I don't like dental hygienists with bad people skills, either, even though you can't really have a good two-way conversation while your teeth are being cleaned.

      Delete
  5. My psychiatrist is a year older than I am.
    When I worked for the Dollar Tree, I had two assistant managers who were eight years younger than I am.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's funny but I always assume my doctors are older than I am unless it's obvious they aren't. I think as long as they're in their 30s/40s and seem to know what they're doing, I'm fine.

      Delete
  6. Lmao!! Oh I know! But I'm so young at heart, I guess it doesn't bother me.
    My dentist is bomb. He's young but so kind. I always feel like I'm just chatting with a friend when I see him. It makes my experience so much better. I had an old dude do my root canal. No bedside manner at all!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Bedside manner is important. I'm surrprised how important it is. I just won't go back if someone is rude or conversation is awkward.

      Delete
  7. So far my doctor, my dentist, and my hair stylist are my age, but I do know what you mean about people around me suddenly looking like kids. I don't mind the age or the gender so long as they are competent at what they do.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree...and as long as conversation seems natural and it isn't obvious I'm talking to someone who would rather be texting with friends than helping me!

      Delete
  8. I'm as old as they woman who doesn't want to start a movie at 8:30 too. That made me laugh.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I actually have said that before...many times!

      Delete
    2. I have too, unless it's a 90 minute movie. And we get started right at 8:30. Then I can maybe handle it. :)

      Delete
  9. Hahaha, this is a great post. I have reverted to cutting my own hair. out of frustration... Just couldn't connect with the hair stylist and neither could she connect with me. I tried several... They all came from the same cookie cutter training salon...I'd tell her how I wanted my hair cut and not coming out looking like a boy and by Gees, I'd come out looking like a boy. No style, just snip, snip, snip... Grrr

    I'd be totally frustrated so I went to the library and got a book on How to Cut Your Hair and I've been cutting my own hair ever since and have has plenty of favourable comments.
    I'm lucky my Dentist and Doctor are about my age. What will happen when they retire. I can't even think about it...

    Have a great day.
    Hugs,
    JB

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That sucks! I wouldn't dare try to cut my own hair, but long, straight hair is pretty easy to trim up. Short hair seems like it would be really hard to get right.

      Delete
  10. Ha, ha. Reminds me: Several years ago, my mother was in the hospital and a young doctor came in to treat her. She immediately recognized him as the son of a former neighbor. My mother was aghast. She told him, it was nothing personal, but she'd like to see a different doctor. She explained that she didn't feel comfortable with him because she kept remembering the times she'd changed his diaper when he was a baby.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yikes. I could see that being a problem!

      Delete
  11. Ah, Stephanie, I'm turning 67 in April and my stylist is 23. But we talk about our lives when I go. I guess she's an old soul. She doesn't talk like a Valley girl, though. I couldn't handle that either

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It depends on the person, definitely. I think with doctors, they've usually been through medical school and have a professional demeanor. I don't even know how old the doctor I just saw was...I'm guessing late 30s/early 40s, but she acted like a doctor, if that makes sense! It's all about professionalism.

      Delete
  12. My doctor who was old enough to be my grandfather missed diagnosing my Hashimoto's thyroiditis for seven years. I'd take a 20-something fresh out of medical school who knows what he or she is doing over an older doctor who doesn't any day. Same for a stylist. If you cut my hair well, I'll come back. If you don't, I won't.

    I'm more bothered by older people bothered by younger people than I am handing money to qualified younger people for quality services rendered.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My hair's fairly easy to cut, but there's nothing I hate more than sitting in that chair for 30 minutes with awkward silence. Eek. I will try three or four different stylists until I find that "click."

      Delete
  13. I think you need to move to a retirement community like where I live; there are a lot of 'elders' still working at the various industries so at my age of 58, I actually feel young :)

    betty

    ReplyDelete
  14. Truthfully, I don't trust a doctor unless he/she's got at least 20 years of practice under the belt. My dad was a doctor. My grandfather was a doctor. Really, this is wisdom, trust me. Beyond that, I go to my community for references. If someone has stellar recommendations, I'll try them out.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I can see how that would be valuable. Medical school and residencies take a while, so I would assume someone would need to be in his/her 30s at least to have completed all that?

      Delete
  15. Age and gender doesn't matter; what matters is professionalism, expertise and clinical experience.

    ReplyDelete
  16. OMG, this is so funny and I can totally relate! When I was a kid, I thought 30 was over the hill, then it kept creeping up on me, and I kept moving the +older+ age out even further.(lol) Like you, all the professionals do seem much younger, and I try to have a conversation which usually doesn't work. Ah...the search continues.

    ReplyDelete
  17. My doctor is a bit younger than I am. My GYN is female and that's my gender preference. My dentist is a bit younger than I am and my hair stylist is about 8 years younger than I am. I so get what you're saying here.

    Have a fabulous day and good luck in your search. ☺

    ReplyDelete
  18. I have a very young and hot dentist, thank you very much, and I appear in his office regularly and on time :) Whenever I notice very young shop assistants in my shops or very young nurses at my doctors, I always wonder where do they put the older ones?
    But, working in YA publishing, I do keep up with the younglings just fine.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Ha, ha, ha! This reminds me of when I went to the foot doctor with my broken foot a few weeks ago. When they (very young) doctor heard I'd been walking on it for a week, he clasped both hands to the sides of his face and opened his mouth in a perfect Home Alone Macaulay Culkin expression. He looked just like that kid!

    ReplyDelete
  20. I think I like to be around older people because my job requires me to be around teenagers and kids all day. And there's not much wisdom to be found in conversation with a 15-year-old.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Hi Stephanie, I feel like you. I know what it is to have a young doctor that looks like my son's age attending to me. Recently I had a young lady dentist attending to me and she really proved herself to be a good dentist. I think it is about meeting the right person and how professional they are in their job.

    ReplyDelete
  22. I know exactly what you mean!! I'm 25, so I guess I'm probably the same age as most of them, but I find it unnerving when an 18 year old wants to cut my hair...I don't tend to get on well with people my own age anyway, so if I can, I'll choose to go to someone older too! I currently work in a school and most of us are young...I find it weird when a parent asks my advice, I'm like, 'but surely you know better than me!!' Although quite a few parents are younger than me too....

    ReplyDelete
  23. My doctor always seemed very young to me, and no wonder - when I started going to her, she was 25. I was in my early twenties as well, and she still looks the same to me.

    I need to find a new hair dresser too, and have no idea how to go about it, other than asking people who have styles I admire where they go. Good luck!

    I *have* noticed that the trades people I deal with have gotten a lot younger - and cuter. Rare is the guy who shows up to fix my furnace who doesn't look like a supermodel.

    ReplyDelete
  24. I moved here 24 years ago and besides my doctor (I get whoever the base gives me, so no choice there), I don't even want to think about finding a new dentist or hair dresser. I've had the same ones for over 20 years! They're not allowed to retire, I tell you.

    ReplyDelete
  25. I think back to when I was in grade school and, being in second grade, thinking that the girls in 8th grade were so old and mature. Now I look at 13 year olds and they look the same as second graders to me. Weird.

    I've never thought about how to chose such things.... I've had the same guy colouring my hair since I was 15, I follow him every time he changes salons. Docs I have no idea because generally unless I am actually in danger of dying, I don't go to doctors....

    ReplyDelete
  26. It would be nice to pick and choose but unfortunately that's not always the case. We have to take it all as it comes.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Worse than with doctors, try shopping on a military base, where all folks in uniform might as well be in diapers to me! I look at these young kids and am floored that they are our there fighting for our country as men and women in our armed forces. It amazes me!

    ReplyDelete
  28. Ha ha. Too funny if it wasn't true. My doctor is my age, my gender and we share so many things in common. These young 'uns are often good at their jobs though. Pity they look 12 years old. :-)

    ReplyDelete
  29. I think I want a younger hairstylist. I feel they'll be more up on the current styles.

    ReplyDelete
  30. I really don't like the feeling that these people are getting younger as I age, it's a bit scary lol.

    ReplyDelete
  31. lol I totally relate! The last time I went to the salon, their new hair stylist looked fifteen . . . and nope, I didn't use her. Too bad, but no. And yes, I also could swear that all the doctors I knew when I was younger were pretty old . . . but they really weren't. So darn funny!

    ReplyDelete
  32. I think most of the doctors I went to in my younger days or now retired or have passed on. My current heart doctor was my son's friend in school. My hair stylist is family, so that's no problem. What really gets to me, is that my former students when I was teaching are married now with children of their own. When I did a recent school visit, some of the teachers were my students. Think I sit down in my rocking chair and think about that..

    ReplyDelete
  33. My last eye doctor was pretty young, her office was also a bit more "hip". She even wore yoga pants...

    ReplyDelete
  34. Unfortunately, you can also add teachers to that list. I'm one of the oldest peeps in my department. Younger teachers are cheaper and They'll go with the flow. Of course, they look and sound a lot like the teenagers they teach...

    ReplyDelete
  35. My stylist is a friend of my son's. He sent me to her. She's young and has tats, but she doesn't talk that way. She sounds grown-up. I love her. I picked a dentist based on proximity to my house. He's about nine years old, but he's a good dentist. Sometimes I want to pat him on the head and tell him what a good boy he is. I'm changing doctors. The one I had was probably around my age and is a jerk. My friend Carol recommended her little boy doctor to me. I'll have to refrain from telling him that if he does well that I'll give him a cookie.

    Love,
    Janie

    ReplyDelete
  36. I would have considered myself REALLY old at my age, as I did my Grandmothers when I was a child...but now that I am one, as well as well as A Great Grandmother, my mind doesn't feel any older than I did when I first thought about getting old over 70 years ago. I still talk to doctors pretty much as I did when I first started going to them...except I've learned a lot more. Their age doesn't matter to me. I figure the young ones know the new technology and the older ones have a lot more experience as I have. The only time I remember thinking a doctor was too young was when my oldest grandson graduated from Medical School thinking he grew up way too fast. :)

    ReplyDelete
  37. Funny, my husband and I had that conversation today. Fortunately for me a few of my closet friends are a decade older, so that helps me feel young. I work mainly with 20 something year olds . . . the age gap shows!

    ReplyDelete
  38. I find them on the directory from my insurance company and then proceed to Google all of them to see their ratings. That's for doctors. For businesses, I look at Yelp.

    When I was a kid, I thought 30 was ancient. It's no longer the case that I'm the youngest person in the room. I've encountered doctors and even bosses younger than me.

    ReplyDelete
  39. Funny enough I don't have that problem. My doctors, hair stylists, etc are older or close to my age. But I shudder to think when that'll no longer be the case.

    ReplyDelete
  40. I've been going to the same dentist since college so he's older than I am. I never go to a regular doctor because I'd rather self-diagnose. ;) My hair stylists range from twenties to forties, so I'm in the middle.

    ReplyDelete
  41. Like you, I make an appointment to check out the doctor, or dentist in question. If they are good, I don't mind. I don't really mind if the person in question is really young, they should just know what they are doing and not speak to me too much. I hate that. I do not want to know what you did this weekend with your boyfriend . . . In such a case I leave and never come back.

    ReplyDelete
  42. I always feel weird when I get a doctor or dentist that's younger than me too. Thankfully my regular doctor is over 50 and my dentist is (I'm assuming) my age, so it seems like she's older!

    ReplyDelete
  43. I've never really thought about it. But you are so right! Luckily my doctors are still older than me, so that's okay :) Great post, Stephanie.

    ReplyDelete
  44. Great post! I get self conscious when I go to younger doctors.

    ReplyDelete
  45. I've been in this unenviable position for several years. I've gotten used to the fact that more and more people are younger than I am as I age. I don't judge people by their age or gender any more than I hope they judge me by the same things.

    ReplyDelete
  46. My dentist is younger than me. He's always telling me about how he goes out "for the weekend". I remember those days. Leave home on a Friday, crash at this friend or that friends house and be home just in time to do some quick homework before Monday, when it was due.

    ReplyDelete
  47. Finding a good stylist that I could enjoy talking to wasn't easy! And while Katie is 10 years younger than my daughter -- I love her! Oh and my daughter and granddaughter love her, too.

    ReplyDelete