Wednesday, July 01, 2015

IWSG: Some Will, Some Won’t, So What?

It's the first Wednesday of the month, which means hundreds of us will be posting about our insecurities. Add your name to the list to join in!



There are people who love my writing. There are people who don’t.


A few months ago, I received this glowing email from a client: “You are hands-down the best writer (with the quickest turnaround), I've found in over 2 years of outsourcing.


A week later, I received a nasty critique from a new client who apparently liked everything else she’d ever read but my work. Guess which one made the most lasting impact? 



There’s an old saying my husband taught me. (He works in sales.)



Some will love our work. Some won’t. We have to face that. One person’s dislike of our work doesn’t mean anything, even if that person is an editor or agent. Because it’s all a matter of personal taste.




So the next time you get a rejection or scathing review, remember these words: "Some will, some won't, so what?" And go find someone who will

What are you insecure about this month?

45 comments:

  1. Great attitude Stephanie. Your husband is a clever guy, but you knew that! Funny how similar themes come up on IWSG at times. :-)

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  2. Yes, good attitude! We just have to find those who will.

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  3. Your work is an extension of yourself and to have your work criticized in a negative way is like a personal attack on your person. This negative criticism is only a reflection of the other person state of mind or taste and not of your work. This person had different expectation and different taste and may not have been skilled in how she/he delivered the criticism. Our insecurities magnifies the criticism and we believe the false statement that was made rather than the truth. Believing in oneself is a great tool to shatter the bad criticism.
    I know that you're a great writer because the majority think so too.
    Hugs,
    JB

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  4. I like that phrase! It takes lots of positive comments to overcome one negative one and it doesn't matter your age.

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  5. I've always lived by the philosophy that if I've tried my best, it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks.

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  6. Excellent words of wisdom! Writing them down and posting them near my desk. :)

    I read somewhere recently that it takes like five wonderful reviews to diminish the sting of one negative review. Why oh why is that the case?! Ugh!

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  7. that is so very true! And some agents and editors are just nasty people :)

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  8. Good attitude. It's such a shame we let the negative nellies get to us so much, but sometimes people are just so so so so mean. Oh well, I'll remind myself of this next time.

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  9. Very true indeed. You will never ever please everyone. Even the greatest thing in the world has haters and even the worst thing in the world has people who love it.

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  10. I like that quote of your hubby's, so true!!

    betty

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  11. I love that Snoopy strip. I have to try that next time.

    Having bad reviews or people dislike your work means you've arrived. If everyone likes your work that means you're only hitting a small circle of readers/clients who are very specifically targeted to your style. There's nothing wrong with that. But if your reach is broad enough that you're hitting people who don't get you or your style, that probably means you're becoming successful, because you've reached an audience large enough that inevitably some of them will not be fans.

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  12. I keep this in mind every day! You never know what agents/editors/readers will like. It is a matter of personal tastes. But if you write the book you love, who cares??:) Thanks for sharing and reminding us of this great advice.

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  13. I think I need to make myself a little sign about this and post it over my desk. It have to remind myself of it every day! Especially with the rejections that come in. Great post!

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  14. Definitely important to keep in mind. This industry is so subjective, and themes to totally hit home with one person may not even register with another. Thank goodness we live in a big world. =)

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  15. Your hubby is a wise man Stephanie, love it. It's hard not to take rejection personally but you have to consider what they are rejecting. It always makes me wonder if they could do any better and the answer I get usually get from my "muse" is, "Heck no...you haven't even tried!"

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  16. Surprisingly, nothing. It's been a good month, in spite of the crazy migraines.

    Sorry to hear about the critique. Those always hurt, no matter where you are in your career. Especially from clients.

    Even though your husband is right, it's only human if you need a little time to get over it. For the record, I think you're awesome!

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  17. Everyone has their own style. You just can't please everyone. Your hubby is spot on with his advice.

    Have a fabulous day. ☺

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  18. Great post! I'm definitely going to have to remember this in the future :)!

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  19. OMG I love that saying! How true that is and can be applied to life in general. What kills me is that someone felt the need to write you something negative-what an maroon. My insecurities (notice plural) stem from not feeling I can get everything organized to feeling fat to how do I start writing about my mom's life. I am not there yet to pick up the pen but I do plan on it...one day. I really do

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  20. Great advice! It's certainly something a lot of us writers need to hear.

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  21. This is so true! I totally latch onto to the negative and forget about the positive. I've let that stop me too many times as a writer. But you're right about not everyone liking your work. Okay, I need to remember that.

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  22. But it hurts when someone doesn't like our work, even though we know that will happen. It's best just to laugh it off and appreciate the people that do like us. :) Great saying.

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  23. I'm so sorry you had to experience something like this. You are right not to pay attention to such negativity and just keep on writing. Wishing you the best.

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  24. Love that saying, and would like to be able to adopt it.
    Why is it that the negatives are so much quicker to register and get taken on board?

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  25. That's true. Can't spend time worrying about those that don't get your work. Look for those that do.

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  26. Yes, Rejection is an awakening. Loving all the quotes.

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  27. Great attitude, Stephanie. We need more people like you.

    My current insecurity is several things on the horizon that I want to move along, but have family commitments now. I need to just focus on family (most important anyway) and know that I will make the others work when I get the chance.

    Enjoy your holiday!

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  28. Love this! We should all have that printed and hung on our walls :)

    Happy IWSG Day!
    AJ Lauer
    an IWSG co-host

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  29. Nearly everything. I'm in the summer slumps. I go from ridiculously busy to working in solitude. I'm a people person. I second guess everything I do.

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  30. I love that quote... so much so I'm going to have to find it and pin it on Pinterest. Unfortunately we believe the worst when it really is a matter of taste... ♡ xox

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  31. As writers, we just need to remember that we're never going to please everybody. It's true, though; I always tend to remember negative comments more than the positive ones.

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  32. What wonderful thoughts and perspective. Life is what we make it, and self confidence is everything.

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  33. yup,I feel like I'm always going to focus more on the negative. I can be in a classroom with every student and teacher liking me and ONE kid not liking me and I will become obsessed with why that one person doesn't like me. I fear reviews! lol I'm worried I will not handle them well.

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  34. Oh, I LOVE that saying your husband shared Stephanie. Brilliant. I'm putting that one in my purse. Thanks for sharing. As for the nasty comments, brush them up in a pile on the floor and put them in the trash where they belong!

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  35. Talk about insecure writing, I've been texting with a man and it's the first time in over 30 years that I've even been so intimate. Writing to the public is one thing, but feedback is just so close to the heart, it's a shame that folks find it necessary to give negative feedback when no feedback would do them just fine.

    Writing to one person, now that's a whole other kind of insecure! LOL

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  36. That's a great attitude, Stephanie. That saying is one I'll need to start repeating to myself whenever I put a piece of work out there. ;)

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  37. I love your husband's perspective on things. I'm going to have to start thinking more along those lines in ALL aspects of my life. Thanks for putting it out there. Have a great day. Eva

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  38. I try to think about criticism and find the context. Does this person typically read my style of work? What didn't they like? Was it something that needs to be fixed, or an issue the person had? If it falls into the "person had an issue", then I try to classify it as so-what. It does get tough sometimes though.

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  39. Great perspective ... and such good timing too!

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  40. Great perspective ... and such good timing too!

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  41. Great saying and one I need to try to remember. Love the Snoopy cartoon. :D

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  42. I agree, most of us get caught up with that one negative review/critique/feedback and neglect the other glowing ones. Love what your husband said.

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  43. Thank you for the reminder, Stephanie.
    We DO tend to take rejection personally.
    After putting so much into our writing, it can become difficult to keep everything in perspective. At the end of the day, it's all about taste/preference.

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  44. I so needed this. I think we focus more on the negativity because we're afraid that maybe we're really not good enough? At the end of the day, your husband is right. I need to print that saying and tape it above my workstation. Thank you for sharing this.

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  45. That is a great quote for life, thanks for sharing. I also like the Snoopy comic :)

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