Monday, March 02, 2015

We Need a “Like” for Life

Although it took me a while to figure it out, this is one of the best things about Facebook:



You post something, someone comments. You can reply to that comment or you can Like it. A Like says, "I saw what you said and thank you for commenting." You don't have to say anything else.




Even if you post a comment below the comment as a reply, if that person replies, normally you'd feel compelled to reply to that reply just to be polite. But where does it end? At some point you have to end the conversation. And that is when that Like button comes in handy.




I've noticed the absence of this Like feature in real life. Especially when emailing. So many times I receive an email reply that doesn't really merit a return email. I want to somehow let the person know I received the last email and acknowledge it, though, without filling his/her inbox with an email that just says "thank you" or "okay."




How cool would a "Like" be in that situation? Or in real life when someone comes to your cubicle at work and won't stop talking about nonsense? If you could just "Like" that person's last sentence and make them go away...that would be awesome.




Do you ever use the "Like" button on Facebook to gracefully end a conversation? Do you sometimes feel like you should send a short reply to an email to be polite, but you don't want to bother the person?

76 comments:

  1. I'm all for that feature for co-workers!
    Not on Facebook, so don't get to enjoy the 'like' thing.
    I do like a reply when I email (which you are very good with!) just because emails can go missing...

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    1. I always wonder--there was a story about a business owner who supposedly sent an email out banning "thank you" emails among his staff and colleagues. His theory was that if you stop sending those last emails that end every chain, it will save everyone time. I think he even put his request for no thank you emails in his signature line.

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  2. LIKE button did change so much at Facebook... I remember the days before it existed :(
    I still pray they will give us a PFFFFT button....

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    1. LOL. Or a, "Stop putting all your drama online for the world to read" button. I can't believe some of the things people post.

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    2. Stephanie...I'm with you on wondering why some folks post so much irrelevant stuff on FB. I've taken to hiding those that post 15 "inspirational" things a day that clutter my homepage so much I miss the relevant posts. Some of the things make me wish, like Bijoux below, that there was a "dislike" button.

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    3. Yeah...the inspirational memes? Some people get out of hand with that. And those same people are now also getting carried away with posting those short autoplay videos. I assume they get some kind of inspiration from doing that?

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    4. Anna, I hide from my Facebook homepage everybody who posts more than five posts a day :) Some people just don't know how to use Facebook.

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    5. I agree Dezmond...I joined FB when my Army Grandson was sent to Iraq for a year and it was a wonderful way to find out he was OK when he posted pics of himself and other soldiers and Iraqi children they gave stuff to. That's what I usually use it for, to keep up with the kids and grandkids and I like it when someone posts "real" stuff...but all those videos and "cute" puppy and cat stuff is a bit too much some days.

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  3. I agree with you that a Like button would be helpful in many situations. Then again, so would a Dislike button.

    I don't do this, but a lot of people I know respond to texts and emails with a :) to end the conversation.

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    1. It's always weird when someone posts something sad and it gets 800 likes...

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    2. Hey Stephanie,
      Yes very weird especially when a death has occurred. I think a comment should be given instead of like in those situations.

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    3. True. The only time I'll like it is if the person has posted "Please pray." I assume in that case that a "like" equals an affirmation that I'll pray?

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  4. I use the like button but not necessarily to end conversation. I don't feel l need to respond to everything. I do wish there was also a "sad" button for when people tell about deaths of people I know, etc. In texts, I have used a "thumbs up" instead of writing to indicate I got the message and all is well.

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    1. I realized a few weeks ago that almost every sent text in my phone is "ok!" I do struggle quite often with whether to respond to an email or not, especially if there's been a long string of conversation and the other person has said something that could effectively end the conversation...

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  5. I see your point here with emails. I might suck with email etiquette but I tend to just not respond to the last email of something unless I absolutely need to respond, but I do like the concept of a like for them :)

    betty

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    1. There's a way to keep the conversation going if that's what people want but I've tried to cut back on the "thank you" emails!

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  6. I'd like a "bullsh*t" button for many co-workers, but I'll settle for a like one. I like to reply to emails until it makes sense no longer to. When you get down to thanks or okay, that is when I stop.

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    1. Thanks definitely ends a conversation!

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  7. Depending on the content of the Facebook post, a "like" usually suffices. I see posts with an endless number of comments and sometimes I think to myself, "Will this ever stop?"
    And who has time to keep a conversation going on Facebook. I also like to reply with a smile face if I just want to say, "Ok, we are done." lol

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    1. That's a good conversation ender, too, and it works in text as well as on social media. It doesn't work face to face, though. If you smile and turn away, some people continue to talk!

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  8. I deactivated my Facebook account because I was tired of seeing all the drama people posted and it really got to me after a while.

    I personally didn't care for the Like button but I may be the only one.

    Wanting approval with a Like button just isn't my thing. Facebook is the right name for this media as it was really too much in my face.

    I don't like to ignore people so to remove myself from the situation seemed to be the best thing for me and I like being away from it now. I know Facebook has it's merits but like everything else, people take advantage of a good thing. It may be that I'm a bit too old fashion but I can't change that, lol... Reality Life is moving too fast for this old girl.

    Hugs,
    JB



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    1. I've put quite a few people on ignore on FB! You can just hide them in your feeds and they never know it. I hide game notifications, too. I don't want to know that you've gotten to the next level in Angry Birds or planted a new tree in your garden in Farmville. (You can tell I've been hiding them a while since my game references are from years ago!)

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  9. When someone sends a thank you note, I don't send back a "you're welcome" note. But one thing I like to do that I don't have an opportunity is when someone sends flowers and there is no return address so that you can send a "thank you" for the flowers/gift.

    There's always that friend on Facebook who will comment that something you posted or some comment that you made on your own timeline offended them. I like to use the "Like" button to let them know that I like that they felt the need to comment about how offended they are by something on my page. lol

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    1. Before GoFundMe, there were several instances where I donated money to friends of friends who had suffered disasters. We survived a flood and I learned it's better to give directly than to rely on charities that are VERY untrustworthy. (Except Samaritan's Purse and local churches--they were amazing.) I didn't receive a thank you note for any of that. Not that I needed one--but I always wondered if the money ever even got to them. It's nice to get that acknowledgment just to know it got there. Now that there's GoFundMe--problem solved. Instead of mailing the payment we can just donate online and you can see the money being raised right before your eyes.

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  10. Omg yes lol I think I have pretty good FB etiquette so when someone goes on too long and replies to each comment I'll iust like the last one and hope they end it there. They rarely so :/

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    1. Oh there are always THOSE people...they just want attention. Or how about the people (usually male) who feel the need to post something rude in response to everything you post? A few male drama queens followed me over there from MySpace and I've had to unfriend and block a couple of them. They usually just want attention.

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  11. While I'm not the biggest fan of Facebook (I've observed way too much drama on that site), I do like the "Like" feature. It ends the conversation in a positive way instead of keeping it going. I definitely wish there was an in-person version!

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    1. People have a low tolerance for that stuff. I think mostly we want to know what we can do to help. If we can't help, we get frustrated. But you start to recognize the signs that someone is just clamoring for attention. There's a difference between seeking support and asking for prayers and just constantly shouting, "Look at me!!!"

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  12. if someone replies on their blogspot blog, i don't get the reply because i don't come back to look for them. on wordpress, it gets messaged to me in their menu bar - along with their 'likes'.

    when i need to acknowledge an email reply w/o really having anything further to add, i just send a :). seems to work well.

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    1. I was part of a blog hop where the moderator smacked my hand (virtually) for not having the "reply-to" feature enabled. So I enabled it and now I get constant emails from people replying to things I post on their blogs. That's not really what I want! I read the blogs of people who comment mine and if I click over and there's a new blog, I read that. If it's an old blog, I read their reply and comment--but as well intentioned as those reply emails are, I use my Gmail address for my work and all those emails frustrate me because they're getting in the way of my work emails.

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  13. It's so true about how Facebook has utilized the Like button to make it easier for all of us. That ease and expectation of replying to friendly emails kind of ruined email for all of us back when it first got started. Can anyone else remember the beginning of email or am I just the old one in the bunch? It replaced letter-writing between friends and family and then got ruined with excess.

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    1. I do remember the beginning of email. In the early days, we did a lot of posting on forums and bulletin boards (AOL?!!!) and email grew slowly. I remember people forwarding around joke emails and hoaxes... You always had that crazy relative who would send those things because there was no Snopes.

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  14. I use the like button to acknowledge what a person said. I never thought about ending the conversation. Okay, I'm not a big fan of Facebook, but I do get to talk with folks there that I otherwise wouldn't talk to so that's the only advantage in my book. Some people just post and post and post and...then post some more.

    Have a fabulous day. ☺

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    1. Someone argued with me about the breed of my dog a couple of weeks ago based on his perception of a picture I posted. When I said actually she's part King Charles Spaniel (says every vet) and he said she's not, I just liked his comment. Sometimes it's a great way to say, "You're wrong but I'm not going to sit here and argue with you!"

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  15. I love the like button Stephanie... I think it's one of the reasons I love Instagram so much.... I just hit like and then comment when I feel like it...

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    1. I'm really bad about neglecting Instagram! Because it's designed for smartphones and tablets rather than computers, I just forget to check it when I'm making the Facebook, Blogger, Twitter rounds...

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  16. I LIKE a lot on fb. And I comment. It's a quick way to have an exchange and to point to longer posts on my blog. I love it when people tag me. It makes me happy that someone thought enough of me to include my name. As to real life...I think we should all have LIKE buttons. :-)

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    1. They would be handy just to give people affirmation that someone's listening to them in everyday life!

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  17. See what you mean . . . we need something similar to a 'like' in blogger.
    In fact the mind is racing now you mentioned it. We could have a 'dislike' one as well to clear all those boring followers once and for all and allow some new interesting ones through . . . lol
    There could be one in the middle saying 'not sure whether I like or dislike but I would rather watch paint dry than to reply' .

    Glad you allowed this one through Stephanie . . . . lol
    Cheers
    Eddie . . :)

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    1. . . . . I should have used this email address linked to my blog . . . :)

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    2. Third time lucky . . . this one . . :)

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    3. I know the feeling! Whenever I comment on a WordPress blog I never know what the link will lead people to--I hate when it takes them to my author page because my blog is on there, but I'm not sure if they'll figure out how to get over here from it!

      It's funny you mention having likes here... There was a similar feature in MySpace's blog community. They were called kudos and you could either give a blog one or two kudos, in addition to commenting. I'd forgotten about that until now!

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    4. Oh yes . . I find commenting on a WordPress blog almost impossible . . . :)
      Interesting about the Kudos idea . . .

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  18. Yup. I often want to do a reply email (that might not be necessary) but don't. I think we're too polite. We want to be polite and respond, but we want to be polite and not fill their email with unnecessary stuff. We nice people can't win. :)

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    1. That's pretty much the essence of this post!!! I'm always trying to figure out what will be the most polite of those two.

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  19. I don't play FB, but would love a like button in life. I am guilty of follow-up emails and do worry that I am cluttering up someone's in-box.

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    1. I get "thanks" emails back all the time. It pops up on my MacBook with the first few words in the notification, so I usually close the notification when I can see it's just a "thanks" to the last message I sent. No time wasted.

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  20. Yes, to both questions. But on the flip side, I hate when people use the "thumb's up" icon on their phones. I'll be talking to someone on Facebook...usually to someone buying an item I'm selling, and our conversation ends. Then I'll get a notification! Yay, I have a new message! But nope...the person I was last talking to felt they should add one of those stupid thumb's ups. So unnecessary. It's like the bothersome "last thank you" email, only more annoying.

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    1. I think someone above said that's what he does. LOL!!! I have to admit I'm not really all that familiar with those emoticons on my phone. Plus if the person has an iPhone, texts come up on my laptop, so most of the time I'm not even replying in the iPhone messaging app.

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  21. This is a brilliant idea! How about code for a LIKE button that travels with you from site to site?

    I always feel compelled to answer comments; I appreciate the commentor...but I agree with everything you said.

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    1. I know--you just hate to leave that last comment on one of my FB posts hanging out there!

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  22. The Like button in real-life would be great. Sometimes I like what someone says, but I don't necessarily want to comment on it, or like you mentioned, mail someone back just to respond with a few words.

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    1. Yeah, the email in response to blog comments is definitely creating additional work...I think just reply where the comment was left...most of the time when a notification comes through that I have a new non-personal email, I look to see if it's work. If it's not, I rarely even open it. (Unless it's a personalized email about my book or some kind of promotional request from a friend.)

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  23. My sister and I will put the final, short message in the subject line, so the final email doesn't have to be opened. It's how we wind it up.

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    1. That's a good idea! I once had a friend who would say, on the phone, "Okay, I'm tired of talking to you now." You have to admire that kind of honesty. Most of us make up an excuse.

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  24. Good thought - we could use a Like button on many situations in life! I use the one on Facebook often. It was nice "meeting" you on Robyn's blog during my tour for Olive and the Great Flood. I like your comment!

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    1. It was great meeting you, too! We lost all the value in our home in the 2010 Nashville flood, so the word "flood" usually makes me wince, but I love the idea behind Olive and the Great Flood!

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  25. I've used the LIKE button plenty of times on Facebook, but never really to end a conversation. To do that I usually just get up and walk away. :) Okay...so maybe social graces isn't one of my strongest suits?!?! :)

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    1. When I worked in an office, I did the, "I have to go to the ladies' room" trick many time when someone parked his/her butt in the guest chair in my cubicle. Unfortunately, I learned some people will follow you to the bathroom, still talking...or stay in that guest chair until you return!

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  26. My FB is never that much of a complicated issue.

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  27. Something about me makes people want to tell me as much about themselves as possible. I feel like a bartender... but thankfully these ear-benders aren't drunk. Well... usually.

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    1. You just have that "listener" look. I've honestly found in life that wherever you are, there seem to be chatters. I think people are longing to make a connection with another human being, if only for a minute. Technology has separated all of us.

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  28. I feel awkward using that darn button on certain people's more negative updates. Sometimes, I don't know how to respond to a status I shouldn't even know about but "liking" doesn't work.

    "My neighbor's cat has fungus again." Do I apologize? It's the NEIGHBOR'S cat. Do I wish it a speedy recovery? Do I sympathize with poor Mrs, Tigwiggit? If it were my friend's cat, I could take any of these options. Do I have my friend pass on my good wishes to her neighbor? And I can't "like" the fungus...

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    1. You're hilarious! OMG these people on FB are wearing me out with their constant requests for prayers. There are people who have real problems...those people need our help and support. Not someone's neighbor's cat. I guess prayers can work for anything in life, but it does become a little like, "The little girl/boy who cried wolf." If every day is some drama or ailment, eventually people are going to tune out (or hide your posts).

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  29. Great idea, especially for emails. I have a co-worker who will always send a "you're welcome" email after I thank him for something. It really isn't necessary, but I don't want to hurt his feelings. A "Like" button would help tremendously.

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    1. That was kind of what inspired this post. I wrote a blog about "tips for streamlining your inbox" a while back. One man's strategy was to ban "thank you" emails in the first place. His theory was that it would cut down on emails by X amount each year, saving everyone time, since everyone seemed to feel the need to end every email conversation with "Thank you!" Or--the even bigger favorite--"ty." So your co-worker would be "yw!"

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  30. I use the Like button a lot, just to let friends know I've read their post. If I have something to say, I leave a comment too. It's fun. :)

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    1. It is sad that we tend to judge whether one of our posts is a "dud" or not by the number of likes it gets!

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  31. That would be nice to end conversations. With email, I find that at some point I don't need to reply, so I don't, and the conversation drifts away.

    It's with text messages that we really need it. Too many texts have not gone through, so we've gotten into the habit of texting back OK when we've received the text but have no reply. We need an OK button for life as well.

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  32. I can totally relate to this post! I love the like button and it would be awesome to have it in life. Emails and texts can get tricky and someone has to end them (I think it is usually me- but I hope I do it at the right time). Hopefully the more we text and email there will be more common ways of ending conversations. The cubicle like had me cracking up. Yes!

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  33. I have been brought into that web of constantly replying and not knowing how to end it. It always reminded me of meeting someone you haven't seen in a while at the grocery store. You talk and do a quick catch up and then part only to see them in the next aisle and you laugh, then you see each other again and make some comment about following each other. By the end you are looking for that person and when you see them you go the other way. Hitting the "Like" button is perfect to not start anything you have no idea how to finish

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  34. Oh, how I do wish for the email "like" function. That would be amazing. Or one for just texts, too, though at least there are emojis for that. And if by some miracle it would shut up my chatty fellow faculty? I would pay for it!

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  35. I use the like button on Facebook all the time, and I wish there was something similar for emails. Maybe you could invent something?

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  36. I wish there was a like on phone calls...business phone calls. I'm noticing I'm saying bye more than once, because the other person on the line keeps talking. Would be like if I could hit a like button instead of being rude and hanging up.

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