The book features words of wisdom from various celebrities and public figures, including Bill Cosby, Matthew McConaughey, Condoleezza Rice, and, of course, Katie herself. Each person details the best advice he or she ever received.
Throughout the book, I kept thinking to myself, 'How would I answer that question?' As I listened to the book, I came up with several pieces of advice I'd gotten over the years. Advice about not giving up. Advice about dealing with difficult people in the workplace. Advice about marriage, family, friends, traveling... You name it. Each day, I seemed to come up with a different piece of good advice.
But the other day I was thinking about a piece of advice I received in my 20s. It came from an older woman I worked with. I didn't particularly care for this woman -- she was cold and, well, kind of MEAN at times. But one day when I was all upset about something, she shook her head and said something to this effect:
"As you get older, you'll care less and less what people think of you."
That was it. Simple advice...but it turned out to be SO true. In fact, writing and reading about pre-teens and teens now, it constantly comes up that young people want to fit in. They get their entire sense of self-worth from what other people think of them. You take that into your 20s, to a certain degree, but then, as you get older, you start to change. Your self-worth comes from what YOU know about yourself. Sure, someone else can hurt you with insults, but you're much more cemented in who you are so you recover much more quickly. At least, most of us do.
That's just one of many pieces of advice I've gotten over the years. I may share some others, too, as I think of them!
What's the best advice you ever got?
24 comments:
That is totally true- as we get older we live more by our own standards rather than other people's. I think the best advice I got was something like 'time will go by no matter what you do. Whether you spend a year learning or you spend a year living under a bridge- you'll still get a year older. The seasons will come and go and at the end the only thing that changes anything is what you've decided to do with that time. Once its gone, you can't get it back so use it wisely.'
Brilliant blog!
Now I'm trying to think of the best advice I've ever been given, and it's to do with love. Someone said 'When you least expect it, you'll find love.'
At the time, I thought it was a load of trite BS, but sure enough, when I'd just about given up on ever meeting a decent guy, along came the man who I'll get married to next April.
Believe it or not, the best advice I ever got came from a movie and I'm surprised I don't hear this one more often in the real world. It was from Picture Perfect and Jennifer Aniston played Kate; was overlooked for a promotion she deserved and to make you watch the movie, I'll skip what did to get recognized but in the end, her boss went up to her to tell her, "In life, you have to dress for the job you want, not the job you have."
I heard this in career books, college and in the workplace in the past. If you want your boss to think of you as a manager type, then act like one. Instead of always coming in tired and groggy and acting like the world is against you, walk with a purpose. Do more then what's expected of you....it used to be good advice. Nowadays with the economy sucking, this bit of advice seems moot and I wonder if it works anymore...it feels like we have to stop wanting to get ahead and just accepting sitting still at your desk without much purpose and be thankful you've got the desk job that you have ...Idk...but for now I still think that advice is the best and soon it'll work again.
This is so true. At least this is one benefit of getting older (and wiser). :D
Of course when you're a teen, you won't believe how true this is.
It's very true. You sort of grow into your skin as you get older.
I'm not a fan of Dr Phil, but I do think his statement that you teach people how to treat you is dead on.
Oh, please do share with us some of those wise words as you recall them!
The best advice I got was from an older lady, when I was a young bride. She knew I was a pastor's wife, and would try to please everyone in our congregation, which is IMPOSSIBLE. She told me, "Your first ministry is to your man." That ons has come in handy many times when I've been tempted to put others' expectations ahead of my marriage.
hard to say. but i think it's totally true about caring less about what people think as you get older. even as a kid, i didn't care that much but now I really don't. and when i'm truly old, i plan to be the crazy old lady doing whatever the heck i want :)
That is so true! The best advice I think I ever had was, "Keep your nose out of it!" LOL (If only I'd take it!)
I find it hard to isolate where all the words of wisdom that found their way to me have come from. I'm with you that I care far less what people think of me now than I did when I was younger. It's very liberating!
I'm not sure if I can come up with any as good as the one you mentioned! I tell my kids the very same thing.
My mother taught me a rhyme once that she has always lived her life by.
'If equal effection cannot be then let the loving one be me.'
She does a much better job with that than I do but I've never forgotten it.
I read a great book about self confidence once. It said it comes from achievements. I totally agree and I think that's why the younger someone is the less real self confidence they have. Oh, they can be cocky but not have a clue. That cockiness can make many people think they have confidence but it doesn't come from the self and it will fail the test every time. It only comes from setting goals and achieving them.
I think the best advice I ever got is..... Everything has a beginning a middle and an end. When you can't see the end of course it feels like it will never end but everything does. So I focus on the here and now and what I can do presently, not ignoring the problem but riding it out til it's run it's course because a lot of things are out of your control.
So true.
The best advice I was ever given was "this too shall pass."
Love this post! I'm actually going to put it to the middle school kids I teach and see what they have to say.
That is golden Steph.
Several years ago a teacher told me to "Bloom where you are planted."
Simple advice, but relevant to any situation--no matter how bad it gets.
"Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by Dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary."
-Steve Jobs
That quote is actually part of a whole speech which you can find on Youtube. I found it very inspiring...
The best advice I've gotten at the ripe old age of almost 36 came from my mother when I was a teenager.... Don't ask anything your not prepared to hear No to, or an answer you don't/won't like.
I follow that everyday when it comes to asking any kind of question and have found it to be very good advice!
Wonderful! Insightful!
The best advice I was ever given:
Do today what others won't, so you can live tomorrow like others can't.
This is probably a paraphrase of Shakespeare, "To thine own self be true, and it must follow as night the day, thow canst not then be false to any man." I use that in my writing.
I would love to see more of your advice some day.
so many times I have thought, if I could redo high school with the confidence I have now...it would have been so much fun!
i cant wait to get older :) it grows tired to try and please everyone in yourlife :(
My Dad always said "just live in such a way that no one will be able to believe any untrue things that are said about you." And really, what else can you do?
Do the right thing, and the rest will fall into place. That came from a cherished neighbor, who was like a grandmother to me.
Enjoy every minute.
Best advice.
LOVE what you said and SO SO SO true...
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